The tipping point

Lysol. You expect a country to have Lysol. You just do.

All this business about "global branding" and "market penetration" and for what!?!? There is a country the size of the United States (Australia, that is) that does. not. have. Lysol. It is a qualified staple. You expect a country/continent/hemisphere to have Lysol. Isn't this why the world has MBA's? Isn't this why Proctor & Gamble hires them all?

Same for Tide. You'd expect that a brand like Tide has extended it's reach to the continent of Australia. I mean, it's Tide. But - as I walk down the shopping aisle, passing the unrefrigerated eggs with a shiver, I'm at a complete loss.

Not.

At. All.

Familiar.

Actually, I lied. Seventh Generation. They have Seventh Generation. As in seven generations later, you are still trying to wash the smell out of your clothes. Sorry, environment.

Trash bags too. The ones they have here - they fall apart the minute you drop a peanut into them. And that - that is enough to drive you over the proverbial edge.

I don't quite know why that is the tipping point. But it is. I actually thought about buying trash bags from the U.S. and having them shipped to Australia to preserve my sanity. Yep. Trash bags.

After 5 months wandering the aisles of Coles & Woolworths, I finally went to the Internet to do a little research. I searched Lysol. Nothing. I searched air freshener. Nope - just flowery sprays that smell like your great-aunt Annie Pearl's house. Then I searched disinfectant spray.

Voila~ Glen20.

Apparently Lysol did not create that smell. It's just a disinfectant spray. And the EXACT. SAME. SMELL. Now that is branding. I didn't actually think that smell existed outside the Lysol bottle. Joke's on me.

I was on a roll. I combed forums to figure out what was deemed the Australian "Tide". There was some argument between Cold Power and Bio Zet. I went for Bio Zet Attack. Just sounded cooler. And guess what? It's great. Does not compare to Tide, but it works well and smells pretty good.

Two down, one to go.

And last, but certainly not least - trash bags. I remember sitting on my couch in the U.S., watching commercials marketing the latest innovations in trash bags and thinking:

Who. Gives. A. Flying. F____.

A trash bag is a trash bag.

I remember watching the actors - leaky bag in hand - poised to pull every strand of their hair out. I mean, how melodramatic. How over-the-top.

Well, guess what?

I'm am now that person!

My trials and tribulations have made me a firm believer in the wonders of polyethylene...I anxiously await the arrival of The CinchSak and The Gripper...I welcome the wonders of ForceFlex and OdorShield.

Bring 'em on! I'll buy 'em - import tariffs and all. Because on most days - I like to stay on the side of sanity.